It feels like forever since I was last on the blogosphere. I want to try a short remedy this morning as my active academic focus is hitting a mental block. This is to decompress #sohelpmeGod.
So, as a woman/lady/girl, you hear all the time what other people think you should do, shouldn’t do, act or should not act like, speak or not speak like, become or not become. The question keeps floating around your head #TobeOrnotTobe.
I’d say, #BE. Be everything you want to be and more, be yourself, be your depressed self, be your unhappy self, be your impulsive self, then be your best self. #BeYou. #BeWhoeverYouWannaBe. Own it. It’s all you and you don’t owe anyone any apologies for being you.
So, 5 things I feel every woman/lady/female should own/possess/have at every point in her adult life are these….
- Her own Man: Yes honey, I know all the feminists be ready to burst my head because I say every female should have her own man. But hey, hear me out first. Own your man. Be it in the capacity of that great friend, a fuckboi, a tease, a flirt, a handy-man, a main-squeeze, a booty-call, a husband, a prince-charming, a rescuer, and for my girls on the hustle, an ATM. Okay. whatever that man represents in your life, make sure you be owning him because you want to, because he fits into your plan. Don’t let anyone walk/talk/push you into something you don’t want.
- Her Own Money: Yes Lady, you need to have a lil’money of your own put away for emergencies. Be it ‘hike money’, or ‘vex money’ for when you are on a date and he is being a total a**hole. But importantly, you need some money of your own that can tide you over for a few months, at least three for when you have to quit a bad relationship or for emergencies we all can’t imagine right now.
- Her Own Mind: Girl, you need to have a mind of your own. You should be able to take your own decisions. When you are all alone and everything seems meh, take a minute, close your eyes, be still and listen to that lil voice inside of you. we all have that voice. No, not the one that says call Eric for a quick booty-call on your day off from work scheduled for your girls. No, not that voice. The other calm lil voice that sometimes tells you ‘girl, don’t even look at his face. This dude is bad news’ as soon as that cute guy said ‘hey’ and you said ‘hello’. Even though he looked alright. Listen to that voice, take your decision and stick with it regardless.
- Her Own Place: If you are not married or in a committed relationship, girl, get your own place. There’s no point living in a tenement or living with 20 other people when you are an adult. Don’t live in borrowed space. You need to practice for the real world. To be honest, living by yourself limits the amount of friction with other people especially if you have OCD or just plain like your things a particular way. Live by yourself, grow your own mind.
- Her Go-to bag/purse: Well, what can I tell you ladies. If you do not already own this item, you should get to it immediately. Your go-to bag is that bag/purse that has the magic qualities of transforming you. How? It holds that one make-up accessory that you can’t do without because it lights up your face – mascara, glam gloss, brow filler or glam lipstick. This bag/purse also holds all you need for an overnight trip to wherever you need to be. This bag/purse is also cute enough to act as a day purse for when you empty things out on a short trip and need a purse to use on a date or an job appointment.
There you go. The 5 things every female needs.