43 ways I have cried

The many different ways we share ourselves…..


i find it a way i can’t describe when people are uncomfortable around crying

i have cried so many times and in so many different lights

in grocery stores shopping apathetically

making eye contact with strangers and pharmacists

at desks of offices looking down and away in embarassment

pumping gas in my car holding myself

on the floors of kitchens and bathrooms in my own saliva and snot

while being washed in the shower because i was too sad to wash myself

crawling under beds to hide

sidewalks and asphalt underneath me vomiting on the road

with a pile of blankets like a nest around me

and frostbitingly cold cars i refuse to move out of

walking, running away from places

at restaurants while ordering food and alone in my room

food tasting like a necessary evil

at hospitals into my knees in uniform chairs

at hospitals into sheets on…

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